
I'm a New Yorker, so I tell it like it is. Be up front and direct with people, and they will return the favor. But sometimes, in more sensitive social situations, you have to consider the source and let it slide.
In business and in life, I've heard people say things that are so outrageously incorrect that I don't feel it's worth my energy to say anything. Sometimes it's easy to just say, "You might want to check into that. I heard differently," and leave it at that.
If you can avoid an altercation, do so, since most of them aren't worth your time and energy. I have to set a lot of things straight every workday, and doing this during social hours is a total turnoff. I'd rather walk away and let other people waste their time. People will, hopefully, correct themselves eventually.
It's also best to avoid criticizing people. Compliments work better, and sometimes silence is the best form of criticism available. I've known people who have said bad things to and about me who cannot take criticism themselves. Most people are one-way streets, and it's better not to spend your time dodging head-on traffic. If you stay silent, people will eventually make fools of themselves without your help at all. It's revenge the easy way.
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10 Comments
I was a student of your executive George Ross, who also appeared with you on the Apprentice. I must say, he's a friendly guy to talk to. As you know, Mr. Ross teaches a class on real estate negotiations. He taught that negotiating something better for yourself, is really the business of life, a mindset... "don't be afraid to ask for more."
But he also pointed out why "being a nice guy," is also key ingredient in coming out a winner in business. The logic is a simple one... the more you make the other person like you, the more flexible he or she will become in giving in to your side's requests.
I've used the method, and I can say, as a matter of human nature, it does work.
D. L.
Per Carell
You peice could use an (EE) Excellent Effort for Correct, and there is truly nothing to Criticize about your work. Some where in life I heard an instructor's grade is judged by the grade of his/her estudenties, along with continued studies: Keys to Life Long Learning.
Great advice. Being straight forward is good and also protect yourself from negative vibes is a big challenge. I liked your tips on taking revenge keeping yourself silent.
Rajesh Shakya
http://www.rajeshshakya.com
Helping technopreneurs to excel and lead their life!
Charles
http://www.charleslau.com
I don't baby-sit people.
I try not to get goaded/baited into a situation. If you goad/bait someone into a situation, the person who goads/baits loses. It's like reporters who try to dig up the dirt instead of the truth. As soon as they do, their life changes and starts a downward cycle until they turn, if they ever do.
Sometimes to physical death.
There are spiritual laws that go into effect.
Remember what people say "What goes around comes around?" Well I believe in that.
Then there's the biblical side, The Golden rule so to speak, "Do unto others etc."
Although I don't go to church and don't want to, I do believe.
If I can, I ignore negative, critical people. Nothing ever gets done. It's always someone elses fault. Someone else has to come up with the solution. It's their (someone elses) responsibility to do so. Etc. etc. etc. Bull!
Donald, is their something in the cards that says you have to baby-sit Hollywood?
Why?
I use to really like Hollywood. Celebrities etc. etc
What the hell happened?
It seems there are some extremely irresponsible, childish people.
Who NEED to TAKE CONTROL of their OWN lives.
They should not need baby sitting. Physically or spiritually.
Why do I say this?
Because it seems they pull on you and I don't like it.
As if THEY want certain things FROM you, THEIR way.
Again, no reverence, no respect.
Spiritual laws goes into effect and they wonder why their lives are screwed up.
Just had to throw my 2 cents.
Jerilynn
Just for the record, I do appreciate someone taking the time to correct me when I am inaccurate about things like the % of people who lose their jobs because of the lack of people skills 85% and I do appreciate feedback and constructive criticism. Oh, and compliments are OK too - as long as they are sincere.