The Importance of a Good Handshake

I don't like doing things simply because I am expected to. A good handshake for any Tom, Dick or Mary is an example of this. I also don't like people sitting too close to me.

There are a number of reasons to keep your hand to yourself. I agree with you that sharing germs is not my idea of being friendly. There are some people I would prefer NOT to do business with, so a good handshake seems unnecessary.

I have developed a keen instinct for people who can't be trusted. Their handshake meant nothing to me when I saw the lust, jeolousy, deceit, or lack of personal concern for me.

My hand (and every part of my body) belongs to me. I prefer to keep it that way. If I want to share it with somebody it won't be because society said it's the correct thing to do.

I look into people's eyes and look for the warmth in their smile and facial expressions. Once I know the person better, I have been known to share signs of affection such as a hug or kiss. This doesn't happen with any Tom, Dick or Mary. I reserve it for people I genuinely like and who care about me.

100% on the money as usual Donald, I met with a banker who just couldn't understand that I don't shake hands. You could imagine her surprise when I mentioned the act of bowing to one another.

Needless to say, she was all convention and no creativity. And sadly as such, she lost my potential business.

Another great post.

May I be so bold as to disagree? At least in my opinion.

I respect your right to choose not to shake hands Mr Trump, and will bare it in mind if we ever meet.

However, in my personal dealings with people, I prefer to shake hands as it does give one a sense of the person's strength of character and can tell a fair amount about one's personality.

Contrary to current "expert's" research on the topic, I don't judge a person in the first 3 seconds or whatever the current statistic is. I at least give someone the chance to open their mouth and either prove themselves worthy or unworthy of my time and attention.

This goes off topic of the handshake discussion, but suffice to say, it's part and parcel of my dealings with people and until it becomes an archaic or frowned upon practice, I'll continue to shake hands.

Besides, germs...? what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. If you don't put your hands near your face after shaking someones hand before washing them, you should be fine 99% of the time.

We agree that gems can kill...a deal.

Isn't it interesting how we do things (like shaking hands) that make many of us uncomfortable (germs, etc), but just keep doing it?

Donald San,

Bowing has been practiced by the Japaneese for centuries, and have been blended into their culture.
A firm handshake give both parties confidence. Bowing give both parties respect of each other. There's a lot of diference between confidence and respect. I feel that if everyone if were to bow instead of shaking hands, they'll have more respect for each other.

Prince Dudley
Systems Engineer,
http://birdseyesview.blogspot.com

This post regarding hand shaking is the 100%truth-some-of-us-are-ashame-even-to-think-of! I saw many people doing disqusting things with their hands, and after, without any kind of washing in progress to offer a handshake like a bottle of water in the middle of a desert. I don't know if they quite have the ability to "think" then or it is just their nature to do this way.

Also, I learned that the good HR specialists can evaluate a person in 7 seconds from the first meeting and a handshake can be the fruit from the cake because it will tell you more about the inner intentions of that person.

Yesterday I heard something interesting at a seminar regarding the Yahoo stocks and I will like to receive the opinions from your readers regarding this.

Have a great day!

Adrian Niculescu

http://adrianniculescu.com/2008/07/09/yahoo-stocks-buy-at-24-and-sell...

Couldn't disagree more. Handshakes are very different from bowing. Bowing is a sign of respect and honor- in days gone by Europeans bowed to kings and emperors but not to the common man. Early Americans took a great deal of pride in bowing to no man. Handshakes do give you a sense of confidence in the other person- you reach out and touch the other person and can sense their eagerness to interact with you- their confidence- their sense of purpose. It is very important in this culture. In this day and age we worry about germs a lot- but most germs are healthy- they build a healthy immune system. I help my immune system with a cup of live yogurt every morning and a capsule of bee propolis. As long as I keep these two items in my diet, I am very rarely sick..

In ancient days, we used to meet visitors at the door with a basin of water and some towels to wash teh dust off their feet. I think that offering visitors a tray with a basin, water, soap and a nice warm clean towel would seem very hospitable and allay your worry of where the hands have been. Then you may shake with confidence.

As far as germs go, the worst diseases that I have heard about come from kissing, sex, blood, improper cooking and sharing foods- heavy duty pathogens seem to need very fertile conditions to spread, so you are not all that likely to get anything fatal from a handshake.

I like the handshake and think that bowing is not that appropriate in our culture- particularly with all the bad backs out there. But hugs are better. Viva la hug!

Dear Mr Trump,

Just recently (before you brought this important point up on your blog) I realised just how poor most peoples personal hygiene is. I often say that if you cannot look after your own body / keep sharp and clean then what hope have you of managing most other things in your life...... that said, I am less likley to shake just anyones hand. However, on occasions that require a formal touch I shall consider this, extending my sincerity.

Sincerely, Martin Mckay

blogspot: - http://martinmckay.blogspot.com/

I couldn't agree more - the number one spread of infection in hospitals or any other place are germs on hands. I would much rather bow like the Japanese.

Best regards,
Jessica Bond
Medical Careerist

I gree with you .Bowing is useful to health!

I am so inspired buy your buildings and real estate. I think you are the best real estate investor ever lived. I just want to be just like you. I am trying.

Dear Mr. Trump,

Forgive me, but I always laugh when I hear this subject brought up about you. The media loves to poke fun at you about your fear of the handshake. I remember one story you told once about how you sat down at a restaurant, and some guy walked out of the men's room and wanted to shake your hand just as you went to pick up a dinner roll... heh. Quite honestly, if I were Donald Trump, and everyone wanted to shake my hand, I would be a "germaphobe" too.

When I was younger, I didn't want to shake anyone's hand, but I soon realized that in order to be taken seriously, to be seen as a professional, I had to shake people's hands. I do believe it's important. I learned something from Don Jr., who learned it from you... take business seriously. When you do, you will automatically project that professionalism in the way you behave, including the handshake. Just be sure to wash out your hands afterwards with warm, soapy water... besides this is 2008 isn't it? It's time to start thinking like a winner... if a handshake makes or breaks a deal for me, I'm shaking the other person's hand.

Coincidentally, I took a nice girl out to a Japanese restaurant downtown the other night, and all the staff did was bow to us... very polite indeed.

Sincerely,

Mr. D. Leung
New York

Yuck!!!!
I watched a woman on national television doing an interview on a popular daytime talk show.
I swear, she wiped her nose with her hand, paused a bit then wiped her eyes with her hand.
She had pimples on her face too.
Then she stood up after the interview was finished, and shook (famous person) the interviewer's
hand.

I believe in good social behavior but I really don't want the person's snots on my hand.

I prefer a nod of the head, a bow or "friendly wave" as in goodbye. In the days when men wore hats, they would remove them with a dapper flair, especially when he was greeting a lady.

Ladies would bend their knee and "curtsy" especially to handsome or powerful business men.

Where have all the ladies and gentlemen gone?

When it comes to closed friend, I think that a hug is much better than a handshake.
I'm wondered if u agree with me, Mr. Trump?

There are many pros and cons to everything... For example although in Vegas at MGM they once had the Gold Lion to walk thru although they did too still have side doors then and now that entrance is no more at all... My point is, the biggest and best way to "get thru the door" may not necessarily be the most impressive or most popular to the masses. Whenever manner be a hand shake or whatever, I believe the best choice for any interview setting (acquisition, job hunt, networking) should be the method that best compliments and respects what the corporation's culture and vision is.

I personally believe in a handshake, I feel a handshake gives you a good tactile flavor of character in another portion of the candidate's confidence and mannerisms; every strategic action in the meeting should be well thought out and planned if possible.

As you shake hands do it with a firm/confident steady tempered handshake. It can be a good reinforcement to an idea you just conveyed and this gives you the chance in another form of communication that you are solid about your position on the matter(s).

I grew up on a farm in the summers and learned from my grandfather the depth of a man's handshake. Large heavy toiled hands but still soft as gloves from grandma's love... I then went on to work in the oil fields some too and learned of the real-world handshake there and all the depth that are meant in those - for they are contracts within themselves... Now back in the business setting; its still the same behaviors...

If you do a handshake, make it GOOD or not at all, like "The Donald" says because I've seen even that can make or brake a deal !

ciao
JAaronAnderson.com
ACompetitorsChallenge.com

hallo everyone..

It's approvable that handshaking spreads germs vigorously. However it is a must for certain cultures like we in Malaysia. Handshake is a sign of respect. People in Malaysia, especially the Malays do shake hands whenever they meet each other to show their respects and pleasureness in meeting that person. Even the youngsters shake and kiss the hands of the elders. But it's not necessary for you to kiss their hands. Thus, for my point of view, you should be able to suit yourself with the people you're dealing with and respect their cultures to make them felt enjoyable dealing with you. Know their cultures well coz the bucks start there! Making people in love with your attitude and degrees of respectness towards them is a great sign of making profits. Futhermore saying "he might spreads me germs if i shake hands with him" is a stupid mind setting.. In this world we have lots of products swepping you away from germs. Like removing pimples and acnes from our face..
Its only a simple comment from me. Whatever it is, the choice is still in your hands!

new member,
edexcom@yahoo.com

Hahaha that sounds like a good idea. I often give a slight bow when I'm at a distance instead of waving frantically towards someone... I think it shows more respect... But for our culture I think some people may find it offensive if you wont shake their hands, unless you bowed before they got the chance to put their hand out... A pre-emptive strike! haha

There's always (what seems to me to be) the new school method of making a fist and putting ones knuckles against the knuckles of another. If you've got something on your hands, once you let people know you'd rather "give me knuckles" since your hands are dirty or they're still wet from the cheap paper towels or environmentally friendly blower in the bathroom. Sometimes I'd rather just wipe my hands on my jeans first so I wont waste time "testing" the preferred drying method of that particular bathroom. I mean, it's just water- I've already washed the crap off. LOL!

David Rader II
http://chexed.com/

oh Donald, you big wuzzie! ;-) Just kidding. I think that a good handshake is important in the American culture. It is polite and it means something to the person extending the hand shake, its a way of showing respect. Its a tradition and a custom! Just go wash your hands!

I'm sorry to disagree. I'm a Malay from Malaysia and handshake is a social convention as well explained by an earlier comment above.

I understand that hygiene is a valid issue but refusing a handshake in society like Malaysia tantamount to being rude and that it is not good in business. Malaysia is not Japan.

My understanding is that handshakes were invented to prove that two leaders were unarmed, therefore it was safe for them to converse with each other.

Where firearms may be openly carried, as in Arizona, a handshake would not be enough to prove that the other party isn't equipped to kill. However, perhaps society has evolved enough since feudal days that we need not fear an armed but reasonable opposite side to a business deal!

With the original reason for handshakes having no value any more, the question is whether the custom is still worth continuing. As other commenters noted, a firm handshake is no guarantee of ethics or capability in business.

Mr. Trump would like to continue the nonfunctional intention-signaling tradition of wearing a tie, while dispensing with the nonfunctional intention-signaling tradition of shaking hands. He's comfortable with being judged in a matter of seconds for his traditional appearance with a suit, but dismayed by being judged in a matter of seconds for his contradicting traditional behavior with a handshake.

As the handshake isn't functional, and it is a health issue, I believe it will be dispensed with in the future of American business. As Mr. Trump points out, Japanese culture already has a suitable substitute symbol of gracious welcome and positive intentions, which doesn't add a risk of infection.

I wonder if both business suits and handshakes will be considered obsolete. Americans stopped routinely wearing hats after JFK dispensed with them. Will Mr. Trump get us to dispense with handshakes? Will another noted political or business leader get us to dispense with suits?

Heh. I'm amused by your stance on the handshake, I'm all for bowing especially since I've shaken far less hands of people than I've bowed to out of respect and greetings. It does wonders for expressing humillity which western civilization could use more of I think. I almost feel like an idiot since I do it out of habit sometimes and people look at me like I'm crazy.

Ya know what? It's good to be crazy.

I think hand shakes should be reserved for mutual agreements and not firm or overpowering of the other; especially if that person has arthritis.

Sounds good to me but it might take a 1000 years to get it done that way. George